For some quick background information I think it’s important you know that I find the life of Christ to be the measuring stick as to what our lives as Christians should look like and while there are many individuals that we can learn from in scripture,  at the end of the day Jesus is whom we must look to. So, whenever I need insight in my life I always like to start there and see where the Holy Spirit takes me.  As of late my recent studies have been centered around the following thoughts:

What does it mean to be a Christ like man in the 21st century and what does that look like in relation to my life’s purpose and my current situation?

I decided that to find answers it would be best to revisit the story of Jesus from beginning to end, going through all the gospels one by one trying to find new revelation on the greatest individual to ever step foot on the Earth. I started in Matthew and that’s where this story really begins.

In Chapter 1 of Matthew after a brief genealogy of Jesus’ lineage we begin in verse 18 with the events that lead up to His birth. Allow me to paraphrase…

Joseph, the young carpenter and his beautiful bride to be Mary are engaged (Matthew 1:18) . It is surely a happy and joyful time for both families, not to mention the anticipation that both the bride and the groom have as they prepare for their new lives together. There seems to be nothing that could possibly ruin what will surely be a wonderful day and night filled with memories that will no doubt last a lifetime. That is until it is discovered by Joseph that his lovely virgin bride Mary, is now pregnant (Matthew 1:18). Joseph, a virgin himself, knows that there is no way that he could have been the one to impregnate his fiance, so he assumes and rightfully so, that Mary has broken his trust and he has no choice but to divorce her. Now, many of us men in Joseph’s position would stop there, game over – end of story. However, the problem with all of this is that Joseph is truly a Godly man beyond what we commonly hear and think about him as it relates to scripture and his role in the history of our faith.

You don’t believe me? Well then check this out… even though Mary has done the ultimate in relationship betrayal Joseph is unwilling to put her through the shame and pain that is surely to come if a lot people find out about her transgression, so he makes the tentative decision to divorce her quietly. (Matthew 1:19) Now can you imagine, just for a moment, the type of emotions that were probably swirling around in Joseph’s head during this time? In a matter of moments everything that he had been anticipating his entire life is now obsolete, he’s left humiliated and his heart is completely broken. Yet, somehow, he still has enough grace to consider Mary’s feelings before his!

At this point in my study I tried to imagine what Joseph might have felt like. I imagine if I were him I might have hit up some of my boys who would’ve probably told me that I had to do whatever was necessary to get out of dodge and save face ASAP.

“The relationship is over bro”, I always knew there was something about Mary”.

On the other hand I’m sure many would’ve consoled me, and most would have felt sorry me.

“Lad, I’m so sorry about everything I can’t imagine what you’re going through, truly sorry man, I’m here if you need anything.”

Many others would probably offer me a place to stay and get away to clear my head and I’m sure others would offer to take me out for drinks, if I was in to that sort of thing of course . But one thing is for sure, I highly doubt that anyone would tell me that I should consider sticking with Mary before making any final decision.

To be blatantly honest if it were me in Joseph’s shoes then our Lord and Savior would probably have grown up in a broken home. Well, luckily for humanity’s sake that wasn’t Joseph at all. You see as I continued to read on, the Holy Spirit reallybegan showing me just how much of a Godly man Joseph was. I mean I know many people, myself included, that turn into 2nd graders for simple things like friends not returning phone calls on time! Now just imagine finding out your fiance was having a baby with someone else days before your wedding day? I don’t even want to think about what some people would do…

Anyway,  before making a final decision Joseph decides to go to God one last time with the situation (Matthew 1:20-24). It is then in a dream that an angel appears to him (vs 20) and assures him that he should in fact marry Mary. She has done no wrong and has actually become pregnant by the Holy Spirit, just so the prophecy of Isaiah could be fulfilled (vs Matthew 1:22-23). The angel then tells Joseph to name the boy Jesus for he will save the people from their sins. Talk about mind explosions.

I don’t think I have to tell you just how random and unbelievable that all seems, but to Joseph this word was all he needed  and when he awoke from the dream he did exactly as the angel had instructed him. (Matthew 1:24-25) He marries his sweetheart and they end up having a baby boy named Jesus who pretty much saves the world. No biggie.

But even after the story was over I just couldn’t get over the grace, love and faith that Joseph had shown throughout. If you read through the rest of Jesus’s story, especially during the tumultuous times leading up to His birth in Bethlehem you’ll see a man of God named Joseph who had to trust God 100% with everything he loved in a situation that took complete selflessness and humility. On the run holding on to a promise and a fractured dream. This is faith. This is what a man of God does, he obeys God with everything above all else. This is the kind of man I am striving to be, I want to be. Amen

Lad Makinde

FUN TEST: Don’t believe that Joseph is the most overlooked important person in scripture? Ask two friends who generally know the Bible to tell you the story of Joseph from the Bible. My money says you won’t get many talking about the carpenter.  

So on the second day of camp I was determined to get myself out-of-the-way and point everything to Christ, but I can’t even front, as the day wore on I wasn’t seeing any significant changes in the demeanor of my team. Yet somehow I still felt at peace, I guess I was just trying my best to remember that God had everything under control. What I didn’t know was that He would confirm everything by making a cameo appearance at worship later that night.

I guess that’s why I wasn’t surprised that night as I walked into the building for worship that everything seemed different. There was an expectation  for God to show up and you could feel it in the air. It’s crazy because the night before, all the male huddle leaders had talked about establishing an atmosphere of worship during service. We wanted to abandon our opinions about the music, the audience, and every other variable that took the focus off the one we were gathered to praise. We wanted to come before God honestly and openly and we wanted Him to show up. Apparently God got the memo because as the night wore on you could literally feel His presence slowly building in the room. So much so, that by the time our speaker Marcellus was finished and the worship team began to sing ‘How He Loves” it literally felt like just a matter of time. During these moments I was trying my best not to look around or think about what my guys were doing, simply because I didn’t want to get in the way. Then just as everyone continued to press into worship, there was a shout from the front of the room. At this point I did look up and what I saw truly amazed me. There were handfuls of young men making their way to the front of the stage without solicitation. I saw some crying with tears running down their faces. I saw others fall to their knees in complete surrender to God, and best of all I saw other young leaders gathering around them lifting them up in prayer.

Now if you’re reading this and you’ve never experienced the presence and power of God, then please understand that this wasn’t some type of crazy religious cult like experience. These were genuine young teenagers encountering a God out of their own volition. A God who desires to have deep personal relationship with everyone. I’ll say this; I don’t care who you are, when the power and presence of God hits you and you are honest and open about your life it doesn’t matter how hard or tough you are, it will break you down.

As the athletes continued to make their way up to the front I noticed one in particular and it made my heart smile. It was Nick. He was the basketball player that had been on my original team, arguably the best basketball player of all the kids at camp. The one who I was positive God was going to use me to get through to. There he was, making his way up to the front, tears in his eyes, completely unaware or unfazed by his peers or the female athletes that were around. And there was I, completely shattered as God laid to waste what felt like the last remnant of my self-serving religious ideas. Showing me once again that his grace was more than sufficient.

By this point I had completely forgotten about “saving my team” that I almost didn’t realize when two of my guys, both pastor’s kids, made their way up to the front. I went over to them and had the honor of praying with them. I told them how much I cared about them and how they were real men for answering that tug in their hearts. I told them that at their age, I wouldn’t have had the courage to do the same. As I sat there looking over the scene I was filled with a renewed hope about our future generations. I was filled with excitement because I saw in those moments just a glimpse of God’s power and it was amazing. During camp God broke me down just as much as those kids and I wanted to stay in that openness forever . By the time camp was over every kid on my team had rededicated his life to Christ. Every single one of them.

There were so many other little details that happened at camp that I wish I could share with you, but it would probably take me like 30 blogs. So what I will say is what I said the week after returning home from camp:

“Last weekend God used a bunch of high school kids to change my life”.

Love will win out -

Lad Makinde

That was the tweet I sent out after returning home from FCA (Fellowship of Christian Athletes) camp during 4th of July weekend in Flagstaff, where I had the pleasure of being a huddle leader. To briefly explain what that is, I was assigned 10 high school boys basketball players that I would coach and mentor in the gospel for 4 days. Our days started at 6:30am and ended at 11:30 – midnight ish every day, with an intense combination of athletic competition and faith building.  Needless to say we were pouring into these kids like the world was going to end on the last day of camp. No joke.

This was my first FCA camp and I really didn’t know what to expect. All I knew was that I wanted serve the kids with everything I had, and I wanted to be open to whatever it was God had in store for the weekend. Little did I know that camp would truly be a “Game Changing” experience for me.

On the first day of camp we had to evaluate the players, so the coaches split the athletes into 10 random teams. My team went 3-0 in the evaluation games and I was able to quickly establish a relationship with all the guys especially one kid in particular, Nick. Nick was arguably the best player at the camp, he had a smooth game and a fire on the court that I loved, which got my mind to thinking…

God you must be setting me up with this kid because you know I’ll be able to relate to him. He’s obviously the best player at the camp and if you can move in his heart this weekend then of course that will probably effect a lot of the other campers! Sweet!

I thought I knew exactly what God was up to and I liked it, because it made me feel important. Now all I had to do was get Nick on my actual team, which to everyone’s surprise and many others’ chagrin ended up happening. Nick was randomly selected by the coaches to be on my team. I was thrilled. God was going to allow me to pour into this kid and make a difference in his life. Here we go I thought…

That was until about 15 minutes later when, out of nowhere, I was told that I would be coaching a different team. I’m not going to lie, I was pretty salty at first. I mean here I was praying and thanking God for the opportunity to sow into this young mans life, and just like that they wanted to take it from ME… I couldn’t believe it. So grudgingly and reluctantly I walked down to the line of my new team and honestly they didn’t look very impressive. If you play basketball, you know there is a certain “swagger” that good players have, Nick had it, but I didn’t see it any of the kids on my new team, at least not at first.

As you can see, I was quickly falling off the “All I knew was that I wanted to serve the kids with everything I had and I wanted to be open to whatever it was God had in store for the weekend” train and falling into the often used selfish “God please move but do it my way” train. That was until one of my new guys spoke up and said,

“What’s wrong with us? Why don’t you want to coach us? We can win.”

Immediately I was struck with guilt. What was I doing, wasn’t I here to serve? Isn’t this what I had wanted, for God’s will to be done? I realized right then and there that I needed to get it together, I needed to throw everything I had at the feet of the cross and just serve these kids. I responded,

“You’re right there’s nothing wrong with you guys, and we are going to win.”

In many ways I didn’t fully realize what I was saying at the time, but I knew it was not only the right thing to say, but it was what God wanted me to say.

Later that night at small group with my team, I went around and asked everyone to introduce themselves and tell where they were from. After this I asked them if they were Christians, and to my surprise they all raised their hands. Although this excited me to hear that, it would soon become a concern when I realized that they were basically all at a stage in their faith where Jesus was still a caricature of religion and not someone with whom a relationship was required.

I asked my fellow huddle leaders and coaches for prayer that God would help me with my team and allow me to get out-of-the-way so that He could touch them and become real in their lives.

What would follow in the days after is something that I will never forget as long as I live.

To be continued…

To all the wonderful ladies out there, listen and listen well:

A real man doesn’t get excited or think it’s wonderful or “SEXY” that you post half naked pics of yourself on Facebook/Twitter/Myspace or any other site out there. A real man knows your body is a temple and should be treated, handled, appraoched and dealt with as such.

That’s sexy.

Don’t you see that YOU are HOLY?  Why must we degrade your gift for meaningless perversion.Your beauty is worth more than 1 million “likes” and 10,000 online friends.

Your beauty is worth more than an a spread in a classless magazine for the perveted and uncontrolled lusts of flesh. Your beauty is worth more than the disrespctful unrestrained ”compliment” of stranger, “friend”, or foe. Your beauty is worth more than the fleeting feeling of acceptance and importance… more than a promotion.

Your beauty is NOT what your Mama gave you. It’s what God gave you. Not so you could basterdize and pervet it, but so that you too could one day bless a real man with this gift.

There is power in patience.

Yes, I know that we’ve all played a part in this sad truth. I know it’s not just your fault, thatwe’ve turned you into an object. It’s not your fault that we’ve bestowed praise upon you for defiling your Holy Temple. We’ve been clever because we’ve masked it as liberation and freedom but really we’ve made you even more of a slave. We EXPECT you to show out, put out, and give up what is designed to be cherised, nutured, and valued. We have no patience for anything else, and why would we? If you don’t then you’ll just be a weirdo, abnormal, an outcast. But please remember and make sure you don’t overdo it, because  then you’ll just become a whore and no one hangs with the whore unless there’s no one else around.

The irony in all this is that you’ve been right all along; there are no men out there that can satisfy you completely, at least not in their own strength. So what does that mean, what is the answer? Well I’m not an expert but I can tell you is this; a real man knows one thing;  that he cannot do anything for you without Christ as the epicenter of his being. See us men we are terribly flawed, we care far too much about conquering and not nearly enough about loving. So, left to our own devices we destroy the goodness and holiness of Your Gifts.

So ladies as a flawed man, I must apologize to you but I also want to encourage you to be patient. To not sell yourself short, to not pimp yourself out for meaningless pleasures whether in person or online. I want to encourage you to put your trust in Jesus Christ, the realest of all real men. Because if you let him, he will mold your heart, and he will prepare you for a real man. One who won’t be perfect, but one that will treat, handle, appraoch, and deal with you like the temple that you are.

Because, YOU are HOLY.
- LadMak

Love will win out,

Lad